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A visual celebration of intimacy

A visual celebration of intimacy… that’s the definition of the new word I made up to describe my artwork when I was pissed off at being called a pornographer. Today’s post is part II of the issue brought up in that blog; it’s rather lovely resolution. Intimography: a visual celebration of intimacy. I even made some business cards for myself with intimographer under my name, but so far everybody who’s read it says: “whaaaat?” New visions take time to catch on I suppose. People thought Vincent Van Gogh was crazy too and look at all the beauty he left us.

The human body is beautiful. And love is the most beautiful thing I know. When human bodies are used to actively love each other, it’s an even more incredibly-beautiful thing. Because that is  how I’ve always wanted sex to be for me, that’s why  draw it this way. I draw loving images of sex to replace the images of pornography that turn me off. Unlike what one might expect from erotic artwork, I do not do these drawings to turn myself on, either (or anyone else for that matter, even if they may have that effect). It’s more like a process of making peace.

arvan's picture

Thai Transgender success story

I found this video earlier today in my news mop mode, over on  I liked how she claims her own space.  Every day, more and more, I come to believe that inside the lives and conversations of transgender, the larger issues of who we are as humans is being worked out at an incredible rate of achievement and fluidity. Questions of identity and evolution that take hundreds or thousands of years to play out in cis-gendered society, are played out in years, hours or moments in a transgendered life. 

The ethics of humanity and the impact of them are felt by transgendered individuals not only as external events and concepts, but as internal, shaping elements of themselves.  I might be the cause of or feel the effect of a value judgment based on gender, sex or body.  I might venture a guess as to how my judgments impact someone else.  I will only see one side (mine) until I get some sense of the other perspective, but I will never have the same level of understanding for someone else's experience as that of my own. 

Someone transgendered lives in a state of fluidity that allows compels them to not only see both sides of the gender binary, but to be both sides.

All people have a unique perspective and gift to offer society, if we can only manage to listen when they speak.



Crystal, a Thai transvestite in Bangkok, led a quiet, normal life working as the Thailand brand manager for a well-known French cosmetics company -- until one day she is denied entry into a nightclub based on her sexual identity. Rather than accepting the discrimination, the episode springs her into action, and has much larger consequences than anyone could have imagined.

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Rose, in a photo for Book of Blue by Eric Francis.

I emerged from six months of conscious celibacy with one thing mainly, which is confidence. I recognize it because it’s confidence that I’ve never felt before; in Hakomi therapy I learned to identify a missing experience when I was having one, and this counts.

Six months is not long; it was an experiment, but for the prior couple of years, most of that time in a long-distance monogamous relationship, I had been grooming my erotic life in that direction. Along that journey I explored many of the same modalities that I chose to work with exclusively between Sahwen and Beltane. These were nearly all experiments in relationship and how I perceive it; in relationship and how sexuality integrates with it.

The deepest of these were two in nature: confronting female sexual power, and learning sexual self-reliance. By confronting female sexual power, I specifically mean two things: one is the prerogative of women to make sexual choices; and confronting my usual state of feeling inferior to women, and subjected to their power based exclusively on their sexuality. There are few better ways to level the field than by figuring out how to not need something that someone else has. Sexual power is based on perceived need. Rampant abuse of that need-based power turns sex into something that it is not, and if you were to parse out many problems that we face in our relationships, I believe that would be at the core of most of them.

arvan's picture

Openly gay man voted prom queen at LA high school

From the Monterey News, a nice little bit of news about gender, high school, self-identification and group recognition.  The mindset of previous generations is still visible, but as this queen demonstrated, it is no longer in complete control.  A recognition of our shared humanity is becoming more and more commonplace. :-)

LOS ANGELES — An openly gay teen was voted prom queen at Los Angeles' Fairfax High School in a campaign that began as a stunt but ended up spurring discussion on the campus about gender roles and teen popularity.

Sergio Garcia, 18, was crowned queen Saturday night at the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel.

"I feel invincible," Garcia said in his tiara and charcoal-gray tuxedo.

A few days earlier, he gave a speech that won over some cynics and led to an ovation and his unlikely victory.

"At one time, prom may have been a big popularity contest where the best-looking guy or girl were crowned king and queen. Things have changed and it's no longer just about who has the most friends or who wears the coolest clothes," Garcia told a gymnasium full of seniors. "I'm not your typical prom queen candidate. There's more to me than meets the eye."

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