dating

Alex Karydi's picture

How to make Lesbian Friendships

Ever feel at a loss? Are you completely consumed by life demands? At times it feels like we are on a stage and everyone is watching us fail! We have a sense of lose, as if it is within reach but like a toy that’s been taken by the ocean’s current it has slipped away.

 

Every relationship has left a trace, maybe even jaded our view of life and love to a point where even if perfection was to walk in it would seem impossible to see her! Or maybe even want her. Why want what you can’t have or ever keep.

You go out and every woman looks the same, every woman sounds the same, so familiar on the surface nothing has changed.  We have the same discussion with different faces and hear the same empty promises and speech of lost loves and new beginnings. 

We have become committed to finding a partner so badly that for most of us friendships have been put aside, until that someone comes along. Others of us have been in relationships where being with one another was sufficient and slowly isolated you from the world. Friendship, the unconditional love we have for what once was a stranger is the equivalent to oxygen in a healthy person.

EvilSlutClique's picture

Seventeen Magazine Calls Transgendered Teen a LIAR!?

Crossposted to EvilSlutopia.com

Apparently the November issue of Seventeen magazine has a transphobic article in it so people have started a letter campaign about it. We're way too old to be reading Seventeen magazine so we didn't notice the original article and the campaign has already been going on for a few weeks... but think this issue is important enough to be passed on. 

Apparently the November issue featured a story entitled "My BOYFRIEND turned out to be a GIRL!"

(You can check out the full article at the Facebook event page here.)

From the original call-to-arms on Facebook:

Rather than use this opportunity to educate readers about transgender issues, it never once even uses any terminology (well, unless you consider the slur "he-she") but instead furthers the common transphobic assumption that someone who's gender does not match their sex assigned at birth is a deceptive liar and even compares them to perverts, drug addicts, and older dads trying to get someone young w/o disclosing their parental/age status.

  

EvilSlutClique's picture

Oh no! Not the s*x!

  
So the One Million Moms are at it again. This time instead of harassing Miley Cyrus, they are taking on the TV Land reality show The Cougar. For those of you who don't know (which is probably all of you since I haven't been able to find one person yet who has actually watched this show) the Cougar is a Bachelor/Bachelorette-type dating show in which an 40-year-old woman must choose among men in their 20s.

Apparently they find this show really really offensive and keep contacting its sponsors one-by-one until they pull their ads. Now there are plenty of reasons not to like this show. PLENTY. But the One Million Moms are against it for all the wrong reasons, in my opinion. And frankly, their complaints are just so damn hilarious that's it kind of hard to take them seriously at all.

the gay love coach's picture

11 Dating Success Tips for Single Gay Men

One of the developmental tasks of all adolescents is to establish productive relationships with their peer group and to understand and manage their sexuality. Dating provides fertile training ground for these teens for learning about themselves and how to establish and maintain healthy intimate relationships as they continue to mature and grow. Due to growing up in a homophobic society, most gay men as teenagers had to keep their sexualities hidden for fear of social backlash and further damage to their already shaky self-images. Some boys chose to distance themselves completely from dating, while others chose to date their female peers to more easily "fit in" and be accepted. For some, there was no other choice for them but to date girls, while for others it was an attempt to extinguish their feelings they had for males. 

Very few gay men had the luxury of being able to openly date other gay males as teenagers and to live authentically. Fortunately, today's generation of gay youth are experiencing slightly more liberal attitudes and acceptance from their peer group about being gay, but there's still a long way to go. As a result, many gay men as adults remain perplexed and confused about how to date other men. Without training, education, and support, many gay men are forced to "wing it" as they mingle and mate with other men, leaving many of them unsatisfied with their dating experiences and wondering if they'll ever find a loving partner to settle down with.

What follows is a tips list of things for gay men to keep in mind as they go about meeting other men in pursuit of their Mr. Right. Add your own to the list and keep it handy as a quick-reference guide as you embark upon your dating adventures to promote greater success in your romantic life.

the gay love coach's picture

Gay, Single, & Loving It!

Introduction

We live in a society that places high value and expectation on being in a coupled relationship and singles are often stigmatized for their single-status. Gay men, in particular, are often labeled as being unable to develop and maintain long-lasting intimate relationships, adding yet another layer to this stigma. This can lead to feelings of low self-worth and inferiority, a sense that there’s something wrong with you if you don’t have a boyfriend, an excessive focus and preoccupation with your discontent with being single, and sometimes a compulsive drive to find a relationship just to satisfy that nagging need (which can be a dangerous and sabotaging maneuver if one’s dating practices are conducted out of desperation rather than conscious intention).

For those who have not chosen singlehood as a lifestyle and do long to be in a relationship, this can be a painfully difficult experience. Special occasions, holidays, weddings, times of loneliness, and just witnessing other couples can be very triggering events for singles that serve to magnify their restlessness and unfulfillment with being solo. What these types of single gay men need most is a reassurance and recognition that this phase of life can be one of the most enjoyable and transformational times of their lives if they choose it to be. This article will validate the positive values of being single and will offer some suggestions for making the most of your single life.

the gay love coach's picture

Boyfriend Quest: Defining Your Vision

Introduction

“Why can’t I sustain a relationship for more than two months?” “Aren’t there any decent guys out there?” These are common questions raised by many single gay men describing their frustration and hopelessness with their dating quests for true “boyfriend material.” Trapped in vicious cycles of unfulfilling dating experiences, many gay men begin to feel powerless, disappointed, disillusioned, and jaded. Not only do they begin to lose confidence, but they can even start to succumb to the dangerous stereotypical myth that long-term gay relationships are not possible. Vision is one sure-fire way to short-circuit this belief and create opportunities for getting what you most want.

the gay love coach's picture

Sex & the Single Gay Guy



INTRODUCTION

“To have sex or not to have sex, that is the question.” While it’s certainly important to have a healthy sexuality when you’re single, how you negotiate your sexual behavior as a gay man if you’re on a “boyfriend hunt” can definitely have an impact on helping or hurting your cause. Have you ever gone out on a date that seemingly went really well to then be utterly confused when the guy doesn’t ever call you again after you’ve slept together? Or what if you’re in-between relationships, what role does sex play in your life? What do you do if that hot guy asks you back to his place after your first meeting? Are one-night stands ok?

These questions remain at the forefront of every single gay man’s mind as he embarks out into the dating world, and they can be quite controversial topics for discussion among gay circles. The bottom line is that there are no steadfast rules or right/wrong answers to these questions necessarily; our sexuality is our own responsibility and we have personal choice in terms of how we decide to express this part of ourselves. But those unique choices you make about sex can have implications for relationship success if your ultimate goal is to find your life partner, and this article will address some of those factors and offer suggestions for navigating through those tricky decision-making processes.

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