the gay love coach's picture

Gay Male Couple Seeks the Same 4 Friendship


Knowing how and where to meet other gay men for friendship and dating has long been a challenge and complaint for single guys, but the task is made that much more daunting for partnered men. How does a gay couple go about finding other couples who are similarly committed to their relationships for genuine friendship and companionship?

I get that question a lot as a coach. “I never see other gay couples out and about. Only singles.” “Yeah, I meet other couples but it always ends up with them wanting to have sex.” For partners seeking like-minded comrades, it can sometimes feel very isolating. This article will offer some creative suggestions for enhancing your exposure to other gay couples with the hope of promoting your chances for building your friendship circle.

Annabelle River's picture

Secrets and Sophistication

As I've been reflecting on my discovery of the BDSM community: I have no doubt that there are many people who practice BDSM behind closed door with their lovers and who consider their proclivities a deeply private matter - and who are perfectly happy doing so.  One doesn't need to join the BDSM social community, or to discuss it with platonic friends (or with strangers on the Internet), in order to be ethical, self-aware, and kinky as all hell.  But personally, I remember having a deep, dark, shameful secret.  And telling my "secret" to trusted friends - whom I had no desire to fuck or play with - was the key to no longer having a secret.  (I'm also lucky in that I've always been politically liberal, and already had liberal friends.)

My very closest friends, the ones I told first, got a nervously chattery version that started with, "I have a deep dark secret that I have to get off my chest."  Actually, one of my very first disclosures started with a ramble about how very stressed I was about college midterms and a theatre-piece that I was working on at the time, before I got the courage to toss in the stress of my deep dark secret, and conclude with, "Or maybe I'm just entirely crazy."

To which my friend responded perfectly, "Liking sadomasochism doesn't mean you're crazy.  Although sacrificing your health and sleep over a school play might mean you're crazy."

Lance A Worth's picture


Hey everyone, It's Lance again.

I have been on Testosterone for not quite 3 months and the changes are going great. I'm gaining some of the self-esteem most people take for granted.

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