self

arvan's picture

Powerful video from one woman to her rapist father

I saw this yesterday and it struck a nerve.  I was assaulted once and she was for years.  Her voice and all voices are welcome here...always.

 

Mastering the Art of Letting Gender Go

Would you, as a father, wear a dress so that your 5-year-old son felt less embarrassed about doing so?

If you’ve been online at any point in the past few weeks, then you probably know that I’m referring to the German dad who did just that for his little boy. The kid preferred wearing dresses and skirts when they were living in the liberal big city, but started to feel uncomfortable after moving to a smaller, more religious, more conservative community. So when he started to consider opting out of his fashion choices, his father decided instead to encourage him to be himself – by donning the dresses, too.

Then there’s the more mixed (and, apparently, untrue) rumor that Jay-Z had decided to stop calling women “bitches” after his daughter was born. On the one hand, he would have been giving up an abominably sexist male behavior. On the other, it would ostensibly have been done to protect his little baby girl – a very gendered response.

arvan's picture

wonderful transgender rights campaign ad from Argentina

(h/t blabbeando)

Directed by Juan Pablo Felix
Photography & Still Photography: Nicolás Fernández & Javier Fuentes
Production: Matías Romero
Sound: Susana Leunda

arvan's picture

itschriscrocker: I am not my gender

I saw this on a Brazilian site today and loved it.

http://www.twitter.com/chriscrocker

arvan's picture

Announcing the Riot 2011 National Conversation Series: Who’s in Charge?

2011 National Conversation Series: Who’s in Charge?

May 3, 2011
June 7, 2011
July 12, 2011

Each 90-minute discussion begins Tuesdays at 2:00 pm Eastern

The Riot’s 2011 National Conversation series provides a forum for self-advocate leaders to talk about:
• What gets in the way of people being in charge of their own lives and support that helps people be in control (May 3rd)
• What gets in the way of self-advocates being in charge of their own movement and support that is helpful (June 7th)
• Ideas about what self-advocate leaders and others can do to strengthen the movement (July 12th)

Speaker List

Sharon Lewis – ADD Commissioner
Ari Ne’eman – ASAN
Beth Davis – self-advocate, Illinois
Betty Williams – SABE president, Indiana
Chester Finn – self-advocate, New York
Gayle B. Gardner – self-advocate, Oregon
Kate Fialkowski – Kennedy Policy Fellow, ADD
Katie Arnold – Sibling Leadership Network, Illinois
Sam Durbin – self-advocate, California
Stacey Milbern – NYLN, North Carolina
Steve Holmes – advisor SANYS, New York
Jennifer Knapp – advisor, Illinios

CLICK HERE TO REGISTER!

ADD (the US Administration on Developmental Disabilities) is currently hosting five regional summits to discover what is happening with self-advocacy across the country and develop recommendations for action to strengthen the movement at the state and national levels. Self-advocate leaders from up to 30 states are attending to speak up about the movement in their states.

The Riot wants to hear from self-advocate leaders in all 50 states, Canada, and elsewhere about the self-advocacy movement in your state. Self-advocate leaders everywhere are invited to participate in the Riot 2011 National Conversation series to speak up about Who’s in charge!

LaPrincipessa's picture

What to do when one finds a triggering, and sexist, blog

We've all seen the terrible blogs, those that bash women, sexualize them, make them seem like objects, and promote rape culture. We all know, and most who are not part of the feminist blogosphere usually can tell right away, that these type of blogs are bad.

But when I ran across this blog, with that terribly triggering image suggesting eating is pathetic, how is one who's not trained to spot such damaging content to recognize their being fooled, tricked, manipulated into hating their own bodies?

In the blog's "about" section, it mentions this blog is for "thinspiration".. meaning it's a pro-ana, or pro-anorexia /eating disorder website that works to support those with eating disorders by posting pictures of skinny models- someone's motivation to be skinny.

If one were to run across this blog and he/she is recovering, suffering, or has suffered from an eating disorder, the trigger from this image in particular and the overall content and language of that blog is immediate. Bad feelings of low self esteem come rushing back and the urge to revert to old habits reemerge.

There is no trigger warning or disclaimer before one enters this site, therefor, anyone perusing the net can stumble upon this tumblr blog (no pun intended) and be persuaded to think :

a) this picture, the depiction of that woman and the entire blog are normal.

b) "skinny" is better than "fat"

c) the picture of this model is untouched and un-photoshopped (which is undoubtedly is )

d) perpetuating the myth of skinny equals beauty is normal and glamorous

All of these issues are those which many advocates against negative portrayals of women in the media write/blog/work against. In this, it is sad that this young woman that presumably runs this blog is so careless in her attempt at achieving her ideal , and a reflection of society at large, of beauty.

To me, this is an opportunity to report the blog to someone or a group that can help. It isn't so much as willfully hateful, rather, the blog is sexist and harmful in a more ignorant and unintentional way. The young women certainly deserves her right to say and type what she wants, yet she seems as if she doesn't really know the damage her blog can do.

So, in this case, report to tumblr, request a disclaimer and hope that real guidance and help is offered to this young woman and anyone else who runs a blog such as the one I've linked.

(Posted at Women Undefined)

Fatma Emam's picture

From Dakar ... with love

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  • arvan's picture

    The Story Of My Addiction

    This post is about addictions, self-harm, self-discovery and eventually, self-care.  I recently had occasion to think back to when I was 20 years old.  I retraced my steps to the present day for the first time in one sitting and was quite surprised with my reaction to the story of my own life.

    Looking back, I was terrified at the prospect of finding my way in the world.   At the time, I just knew that I was getting high all the time and felt shame, despair and fear like a lump in my throat almost choking the breath out of me.  I was on the verge of a great sadness, constantly frightened and alone.

    I looked around for love or sex or something to quiet that feeling of loneliness, but no such comfort was there to be found.   I remember awkward, clumsy moments with women and some conversations we had about sexuality, friendship and literature/music.  I remember standing in my kitchen talking to one woman on the phone about her attraction to women.  She was wondering where to go with it and I wanted to be her friend even if it meant not being a lover.  I hope to god that I actually communicated that!

    I remember another girl that I tried to get a relationship with, but she eventually stopped the relationship because I had no money and no clear indication that I was going to have any.  That triggered my shame issues and I chose to leave for the Green Berets like some romantic sod off to the French Foreign Legion in the wake of a broken heart. (what a mope!)

    I figured that if my life didn't change, I was going to end up as someone standing around talking with great authority about how my life would be if I ever lived one.

    So, off I go to the Green Berets because it was the hardest thing I could find in the military.  I joined the Green Berets because I was lost in my life.  I figured that I would either grow up or die trying.

    arvan's picture

    New Film from LGBTCentreMongolia: Tsenher tengeriin tsaana

    Created as part of an exhibition at the Mongolian National Modern Art Museum, Behind The Blue Sky depicts an unmentionable love between two Mongolian boys - one from the capital city of Ulaanbaatar, and the other, a nomadic herder from the countryside.

    To protect the identities of the Mongolian actors, their faces are obscured by a khadag, a traditional blue scarf.

    Created by Sean Devaney & Brandt Miller
    .

    arvan's picture

    Sarah Graham: A Letter to my Body

    'A Letter to my Body' is a series of essays - broadcast on BBC Radio 3 - in which five thinkers, artists and writers ask themselves how they relate to their own bodies.

    Sarah Graham, a successful therapist and addictions counsellor, explores her at times turbulent relationship with her body.  From the age of eight Sarah was given ongoing medical treatment but she only learned the real nature of her diagnosis at the age of twenty-five when a gynaecologist finally revealed the truth: that she has XY chromosomes and is an intersex woman.

    Doctors had even shielded her parents from the truth about her "disorder of sexual development".

    The shock of the revelation led Sarah on a path of depression and addiction which nearly killed her. However she has gradually rebuilt her health and her self esteem. In this essay she makes peace with her body and challenges homophobia in religion and our society's polarised expectations of gender.

    AIS Support Group: http://www.aissg.org/

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