Lesbian Sex Ed: Let’s talk Anal!

Alex Karydi's picture


I was talking to my sister on the phone the other day and the conversation found it’s way in the most amusing and yet unspoken place “how do you feel about anal?” she says to me without a second of hesitation.  Now, there is very little I haven’t dealt with; however, I don’t think anyone is ever prepared to hear that come out of their little sister’s mouth.

After a giggle and all the why’s and how’s were answered, I wondered how much Lesbians knew about anal sex and how many were willing to share their experiences and feelings around this dark and often scary topic. I tested this hypothesis on my girlfriend by asking her “how do you feel about anal?” All I got back was a smile and a wink, which I am still working on the verbal translation. 

There are many words to describe the anus: back-door, back eye, bum hole, butt pussy, chuff, date, flipside, moon, rosebud, third eye, round eye, trap two, workman’s entrance (or lesbianized a workwoman’s entrance), arsehole, batcave, blowhole, butthole, ring, fudge tunnel, pooh chute, tan track and the list goes on. I don’t care what you call your dirt road; it is still an amazing place to explore sexually and can be a lot of fun.

 Most women are concerned in this area as their can be sometimes nasty surprises, and no one wants to be embarrassed, vulnerable and naked in bed. Yes, there are some things that could happen during anal sex that are unplanned but isn’t that with anything. Sex is a messy often very wet experience. There is sweat, saliva, vagina lubrication/ cum (aka honey pot butter), and sometimes even blood.

 So, maybe by now I have repulsed you so much you’re asking, “well what’s the point if it’s so nasty?” Anal sex is not nasty that is the point! Anal sex is very similar to having vagina intercourse, the difference is the skin and lining of the rectum is rich in nerve endings and is capable of producing increadible sensations.


Women can experience intense orgasm through anal penetration, especially when combined with clitoris or oral play.  Just like vagina penetration, in order for pleasure there needs to be lubrication, communication, and relaxation. Most women would be surprised to know that having anal sex can be a fantastic internal massage as we tend to keep all our anxieties in our bums.  Personally it is my favorite area to kiss and nibble on, there is nothing more delicious than a bottom.

Other reasons to have anal sex are that it can help in the healing process of hemorrhoids, it is indirect G-spot stimulation, widens the fun things you can do in bed, and you can feel naughty as well as feel vulnerable.

So here is how to make is safe and “clean”:

  1. Communicate and talk about your fears of being vulnerable and wanting to experiment.

  2. Build the excitement by having fantasies around it (send some dirty text with what your going to do her and how you are going to make her yours).

  3. Make sure you go to the bathroom and empty your bowls, and if you are really nervous of some poop coming, which by the way is no big deal, but a genuine concern then take an enema. Side note on using an enema: never after sex, do not use them everyday, don’t share enema equipment and DO NOT add stimulants like coffee or alcohol to enemas it will make you sick.

  4. Have a bath or shower. Get some nice warm water on your body and some good smelly stuff all over.

  5. Be aware of your diet, for example make sure your eating fiber and stay away from foods that can leave residual waste in your rectal tissue such as seed, nuts, orany kind of berry.

  6. Most women know this but keep your nails short, clean and trimmed (no hanging nails please they hurt!).

  7. Start slowly caressing with you finger, and then hand, where eventually you could use a dildo.

  8. Wear gloves as it will protect your partner from any tears and it will be super smooth against her skin.

  9. Lubricate and make sure you have lot’s of it because it fantastic and wet sex is mind blowing.

  10. 10.  RELAX… sex is all about enjoyment, pleasure, and adult play!

 Sex is more of mental activity, then it is physical and how you view the world, yourself, and your partner will determine your level of comfort.  Sex is also a learned activity and therefore becoming confident in experimenting is the willingness to be open to learn and try things out. The sky is the limit and the best part is you don’t have to do it alone because you get to have a co-pilot along for the ride!

For more resources please check my Lesbian Literature page.

~The Lesbian Guru

If you have any questions, comments, or concerns please feel free to email me at TheLesbianGuru@Gmail.comwith ExaminerQ as the title or you can follow me on my Blog http://TheLesbianGuru.com! Or  just Join The Lesbian Revolution of Health & Love on http://Twitter.com/TheLesbianGuru or http://Facebook.com/TheFemmeGuru.

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